The Easter Party (April 24th)

Well, as expected, the annual Easter Party was eagerly awaited and almost surely destined to go down in living history as legendary... Inquiries had already been received as early as March in regards as to what the theme would be and I had spent a lot of time thinking of a party theme that would really stun everyone. This is because the "Tahitian Wedding" theme of the Valentine's Day Party had been so extraordinary that undoubtedly many people were expecting something truly out of this world!

 

Anyway, it was with great pleasure that I announced that the theme would be "James Bond's Adventures" and several people already sent messages to book certain characters from the movies and novels, which was a lot of fun in itself... There were a number of guests that wanted to come as anyone of the actors who have played the role over the years and understandably had their favourites. Shimbavi, as usual, decided to play Octopussy, Torquay immediately booked PussyGalore (for obvious reasons) and Kimberly decided on playing Solitiare. Brianna wanted to play Allota Vagina from the Austin Powers movies, which would have been hilarious, but reluctantly agreed on playing Honeychile Rider.

i had a lot of work to get someone to cater the occasion, as there seemed to be a lot of private functions going on that weekend, which kind of reduced the available options. However, I did manage to get a company to organise a spread for the party, which had a wide range of dishes for the guests. The Alcohol selection was the most important, knowing the guests that were booking and so the company agreed to put on a full bar with all the beer and liquor that would be needed.


The big day arrived and all of the Housemates disappeared to get their costumes ready and also the necessary beauty preparations. This allowed me to organise the initial beach party social for all the guests at Maiden's Cove just to the right of Camps Bay with the surprise entrance of mine that I was planning.

At 4pm, everyone had arrived at Maiden's cove and were awaitng the start of the festivities, when suddenly a Sean Connery look-alike came screeching around the Clifton peninsula, pursued by two other speedboats and a couple of jet-skis. James Bond dodged and avoided the attacks of the SMERSH assassins before careening full tilt up through the surf and beaching his jet-ski on the sand, as he handed the keys to the awaiting lifeguard, saying, 'Becareful of her... She knows how to kick when you least expect it!'.

Of course, it was all a staged performance, but the guests really enjoyed the melodrama and they were kept on their toes when the Bond Girls parachuted out of the sky from a low-flying aircraft! The First to land was Octopussy (Shimbavi) in a platinum jumpsuit with an elaborately designed Octopus logo stenciled on to it. The next was Solitiare (Kimberly) in a breathtaking torquoise catsuit with all of the voodoo patterns to make a priestess proud. Then came in Kissy Suzuki (Mei-Li) on a kayak dressed to kill like a Japanese pearldiver with her basket of seafare. Then out of the sea stepped a vision to make Aphrodite jealous, as Honeychile Rider (Brianna) surfaced wearing little more than a smile. Finally, the aircraft did a tight banking turn and landed on the sea in front of us, before taxing up to the beach. Out of the passenger door hopped none other than Pussy Galore (Torquay) in a fiery red jumpsuit, which she ripped off to reveal a scanty bikini of the same color.

So that was the introduction to the evening, which left more than a few surprised looks on the face of the guests and quite a number of shocked looks on the faces of the local residents. The five Bond Girls then started trying to subdue Sean Connery in their own inimitable styles, as several of the locals whistled and voiced their encouragement.

Nonetheless, the Superagent spurned their attacks and defeated them repeatedly until they were all helpless at his mercy... Octopussy was hog-tied on the sand, Solitiare was crouched clutching her catsuit to her naked body, Kissy Suzuki was trying to cover her nakedness with some palm leaves, Honeychile Rider stood bound naked to a nearby palm tree and Pussy Galore tried her best to bury her completely naked body in the sand!

The whole group then hurried from the beach to the awaiting cars that were going to take them up to the house and the Inimatable Bond ushered the blushing captives into a limo, as a score of youths and locals whistled and made catcalls.

Once ack at the house the guests chuckled, as the limo arrived with the topless Bond Girls hanging half out of the large side-window and grunting repeatedly, as the intrepid James Bond had his way with them all. Of them all, Kimberly was the most scarlet faced, as she had to jog hurried through the guests to get herself dressed again. Torquay was the next to make the mad dash for the front door, as the blushing Mei-Li crouched in the doorway to deal with some urgent personal business and both Brianna and Shimbavi raced headlong for safety...

The Housemates all rejoined us some minutes later, in their costumes, as the guests sipped champagne on the deck at the back of the top floor. There was a lot of laughter and joking around, as the ladies all replied to the guests compliments. It was quite humurous how the housemates had all been subdued so easily, despite the fact that there had been five of them against me...

The Party was soon underway, despite the early daylight hour, as several of the guests and their partners got into conversations with the Housemates. Before we knew it, the Easter Meal was being served (and no it was a "Last Supper"...) of delicious Cape Malay Cuisine with side-dishes of Indian Curries (including atchar). For the uninformed, Indian atchar is very similar to fruit chutney, but spicy and hot...

After the meal, we all sat back and talked while a number of poeple began dancing, which involved most of the Housemates as well. As the afternoon wore on, the guests started getting into water-fights with the Housemates, who repeatedly ambushed several people from time to time, whenever they got the opportunity and even I had to have a go at Brianna and Kimberly with their water-pistols.

Before things got too out of hand, I got everyone to gather around for the Best Costume Competition, which was a riot of fun, as the Housemates really hammed it up! It was a close call, as to whether Ernst Stavro Blofeld and Else Klensh from SMERSH or Scaramonga or Goldfinger and Pussy Galore were the best dressed, but Blofeld won in the end. Then it was the turn of the Bond Girls and the panel of judges was really in a quandry as to whether they liked Octopussy or Vespa Lynd or Honeychile Rider or Pussy Galore or Mary Christmas more... Though eventually, under duress, they chose Octopussy (Shimbavi), which really made her day! The Final Competition was for the Best James Bond and that was just as contentious, as there was a lot of competiveness from: Pierce Brosnan's "Devil may care"; Sean Connery's "Kiss & Kill"; or Daniel Craig's "Vitruvian Man"... After several rounds of voting, the judges had to progress to knock out rounds of judging with the Bond Girls joining in with the Bonds that they appeared with and that finally broke the deadlock, as Sean Connery took the prize! But then who could stand up to Sean Connery's James Bond, especially with the calibre of Bond Girls that he met?

By that time, the sun had started to set and we got the paintball competition underway with the guests competing against the Housemates and one or other of the James Bonds in a Gladiator style obstacle course, which was simply incredible! It was a riot as the SMERSH team tried to take out Sean Connery and Failed dismally... Then Scaramanga (the Man with the Golden Gun) got ripped to shreds! In the end, it was the three top James Bonds that faced off in a sudden death pistol combat that had everyone either cheering wildly or ducking for cover! The Score = Smersh: 3; Scaramanga: 5; Peirce Brosnan: 7; Daniel Craig: 4; and Sean Connery: 15!

After that everyone went back to dancing, while the combatants (victors and vanquished) headed for the Jaccuzi or the Suana with various Bond Girls and Villianess' in tow. Yes... I know. You all thinking that here they go again on another round of sexcapades, but then it really wasn't what we all had in mind, as the competiitions had been very intense and a lot of us were sore or stiff. And No Not In That Way! And Yes... It was a clothing optional case in the Sauna and Jaccuzi... A real Bacchanalian Flesh Pot!